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| Don't Dream It's Over
Oh, but it is.
I think the time has come for me to check out of xanga. I think you get to a point in life where so much is going on, it's nearly impossible to keep people truly updated via xanga (unless you commit part of your soul to this beast of a system). I could tell you little stories, but they are just entertainment, not what's really going on in my life. I have so much to say, that I can think of nothing at all to say everytime I get on here (it made sense in my head). It's like trying to catch up during an overdue phone conversation.
I don't want you all to think that my choice to end my love affair with Xanga by any means reflects on my affection for you. I care for you guys very much, and in fact that's partially why I'm leaving xanga. I think by staying on here I convince myself that I am keeping in touch with you all and continuing my friendships with you...when I'm not. Really xanga doesn't aid me in building my friendships with you, it just gives me the false impression that I am and gives me an excuse to not talk to you all personally.
There's so much going on in my life, and I want to know what's going on with you all. My email is ashley4prez@gmail.com, and my IM is debatemyguitar. I'm not going to be retarded and post my number, but if you email me I'll get it to you. So let's keep in touch.
I love you all so very much and I pray Jesus does amazing things in your life... I know He will.
Much love,
Ashley | | |
| Oh, just to be Your friend.
I haven't posted in a long time, because I want to write things that will be interesting to you all. Trust me when I say, I am still an amazingly hilarious person. That is just an inherent part of my being, which can not be helped. But when I think about writing something, I can't think of anything to write about but Jesus. And I think I'm afraid that won't be ineresting to you all. I guess I could tell you stories about crazy drunks or professors who must've been beaten over the head several times as a child or exciting adventures in some of the clubs I'm in or I could just rant about something and be generally amusing. But, when I think about only writing one thing, all of those stories pale in comparison. Jesus is really my passion and... my life. God isn't just a part of my life anymore, He is my life. So, it's hard for me to tell people what's been going on with me without talking about Jesus. And so, I will.
God has taught me so much in the past few months. So much has changed. I've come to realize that 'my' life is not mine at all, but His. All I have to do is be open and ready to be used by God in whatever way He desires. Right now, I don't think I'm majoring in politics anymore, because I feel like God is leading me away from it. It is so disorienting and difficult to give up something that you've always dreamed of doing and always thought you would do, but there is so much joy in following God's plan for your life. It's so cliche, but He knows what He's doing. I think we are sometimes scared to venture into the unknown. Maybe we think we're not good enough, or we think it's too uncertain. But God can use anyone if they will surrender, even the broken...even me.
Oh, just to be Your friend
And just to lean upon You
I want to know the secrets of Your heart
Jesus, make me Your friend. | | |
| My first love.
Today I am going to write about a very special person in my life.
His name is Jesus.
I love Jesus because He is always faithful and loving and merciful and always there for me. He is my best friend, and I am so glad that I've gotten to know Him and that He's cared enough to get to know me.
When I think about how much time I give to my friends or even acquaintances in comparison to how much time I give to Jesus, I am saddened. I can talk to hours to my friends, but sometimes I find it so easy to ignore my best friend. I mean, it's not as though Jesus isn't here with me. It's not as though He is not a real person in my life. He's always standing right here with me, or sitting in the chair next to my computer desk... just waiting to spend some time with me.
I am sorry for not showing You how much I love You, Jesus. You are the most important person in my life, and I am going to start treating you as such. If you love Jesus, have you taken the time to tell him today?
....Did I mention He stole my heart? Yeah, He definitely did. And from what I hear, there's no getting it back. Apparently He's got it for eternity.
Hey, I'm down with that. | | |
| So, I got tagged by Jennifer and Dee, and I don't want to be mean and not respond. Thus:
5 songs I like right now:
1. Oh my goodness, this one worship song. I don't know what it's called, but some of the words go "How can I stand here with You and not be moved by You?" oh, google search. It's called "Everything" by Lifehouse.
2. Love Song by Third Day
3. Broken Road by Carrie Underwood and Rascal Flatts
4. I Want to Fall in Love with You by Jars of Clay
5. I'll be Missing You by Puff Daddy (back when that was his name) and Faith Evans
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| Highlights of my week in a nutshell.
*Sponge came to visit me. well, really the school, but it sounds better if I just say me. Chinatown... good times.
*Saw Cindy Sheehan speak. She has the most annoying voice I have ever heard. Okay, maybe the second most annoying voice, cuz there is this one dude...
*Got an A- on my first stats test... which, considering I've skipped half of the classes (basically, because it's a stupid class), is not bad. Not bad at all.
*Saw Jimmy Carter speak. I'm not a huge Carter fan. I 'for-shame'd him when he was speaking (parli people will know what I mean). Pretty much because he was saying stupid things.
*Talked to Jennifer, which i don't dislike.
*Went to a cocktail party. Stop laughing. It was actually... not that fun. But I did meet some 'key' Republican people and scored a couple connections for internships.
Yes. That's it. | | |
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